The Guilt of Murder (One-Shot)
by Leederlee
Summary: During and after the events of the explosion in Jade Mountain Acadamy, Sora is frantic. She's set off a bomb in order to get justice for her sister. We all know the story of the explosion from Moon's view. What we don't know is the thoughts of the dragon who caused the chaos. Sora. This is my take on what was going on in her head the day the bomb went off. Rated T for death.


Sora walked next to her brother, Umber. They were approaching the history cave for their next class. The class that Sora had planted a bomb in. Thoughts spiraled through her head at the thought of the bomb. _Crane, I'll finally avenge you! Icicle will be dead, dead, dead! I knew that she would kill others, I'll have saved lives!_ Sora thought, thinking suddenly about what Icicle had said in her sleep nights before, " _Killing is easy enough."_ those four words had convinced Sora that she'd be doing the world a favor when she avenged Crane. The memory flashed through her head, as it often did nowadays whenever she saw Icicle's face. Those eyes, the gleam of murder as she mercilessly killed her sister. Her sib. Her Crane. Every time she saw the face of that murder, Crane's surprised, fierce eyes passed through her head.

Umber rushed through the halls, trying not to be late and Sora followed, eager and frightened to see if her plan had worked. The dragons around her brought up memories of battle and she began to calm herself with her mud technique. She had resorted to that kind of mind meditation often now. Crane had taught it to her. To help keep the bad thoughts and memories from taking over her mind during the war. They rounded the corner and started down the hallway that leads to the history cave. When they were fairly close a loud bang went off. _My bomb._ Sora thought, before submerging back into the mud pit in her mind. Submerging to avoid the flashes of war that dashed through her mind.

Moon was on the ground, the rest of Umber's winglet incircled her. Wait, not all of them. Where was the SkyWing? _Did I hurt others?_ Flickered in Sora's mind for a moment. Two seconds had passed. She could hear voices before her as she and Umber got closer and closer. Umber coughed as the smoke-filled their lungs.

"What do we do?" Sora began to hear Kinkajou shout, "What do we do?" Sora's eyes grew wild and terrified as more flashes of battle ran through her head. _Mud, submerge yourself, block it out._ She told herself quickly. Her mind raced as she began to take in the fire and chaos that _she_ had caused. _I didn't think it'd end like this._ Sora thought in panic and guilt.

"I'm going to get help!" Umber yelled and took off, leaving his sister there alone by the disaster she'd caused. Sora felt broken. Like an IceWing's tail had just slammed into her chest, leaving holes where sanity once was. What was she going to do? Her brother wouldn't understand. Or would he? Did he know who Icicle was, what she'd done to them?

"Is anyone hurt?" Sora asked in a high pitched tone, "Where's Icicle?" Sora looked at them all. If Icicle wasn't in there, she was going to lose it. She had gone through all this trouble to get rid of her. To free herself of this burden. To get revenge for Crane. Her beloved sister, her _departed_ sister. The sister that she should've never lost. It was Icicle's fault. All _Icicle's_ fault. Sora looked at them, waiting for a response.

"She's alright, she wasn't inside." Moon informed her, twisting her neck around as if to check. Sora shattered. Like someone had hit a thin, cracked mirror, with a hammer. She felt her mind crumble and the world fuzz, barely hearing Winter say anymore.

"At least two dragons were in there" Sora heard a fuzzed out version of Winter's voice tell her. _Two dragons?_ Sora asked herself, _I probably killed_ two dragons _?_ Her once held high wings dropped. _I just_ killed _two innocent dragons? For the sake of_ one _life?_ She saw her Bigwings, Clay, come down the hall with Peril. He told them something but Sora didn't hear. She stood and watched him go in, protected by fireproof scales. Peril followed in after. Sora felt her legs wobble with grief, guilt, and pain of what she had just done. What _had_ she done? Killed two dragons just to get rid of one? She saw Peril drag out a body. A burnt dragonet. Hints of red, the unburnt scales of the dragon, shown across the body. The horns her long and burnt to black. Sora realized that this was Carnelian, the SkyWing in Umber's winglet, and she wasn't breathing. Sora took a shocked step back. Carnelian, dead, all because of her? Sora knew now that she was indeed a monster. A monster that scared her. A monster that no sib of her's could ever love. She saw Clay turn to her. She looked up at him with sad eyes. Those eyes welled over with tears and she couldn't think straight.

"How many are still in there?" Clay asked, looking deep into Sora's eyes. She could see worry and the determination to protect his students and her. However, Sora didn't believe anymore that she deserved to be protected, not even saved from the horror that overwhelmed her mind now. No one should save the monster that she'd become. Why should a murderous creature like her be saved when Carnelian wasn't? When she had _killed_ others to get revenge? When had she become this… evil? This murderous? This hideous, horror-filled _monster_?

Sora just opened and closed her mouth, trying to respond. Who else had she hurt?

"...Tamarin…" She heard Kinkajou tell Clay. Clay nodded and dashed back in. Tamarin. She had hurt _Tamarin?_ Tamarin was a great friend, she had been so happy to meet her. Tamarin had shown her kindness that no other dragons had except her sibs. Would her sibs want her back after what she's done?

Sora gave a choked sob and ran. She ran away as fast as she could. Keeping her wings in tighter as guilt seized her. Tamarin, Carnelian… why should she live after she hurt them? _Killed_ them? She'd killed one of her only friends at this school. Sora rounded the corner and stopped at her cave, arriving at her bed.

"Oh Tamarin…" Sora whispered as she slumped onto her bed. She wrapped her wings around herself, curling up. She was the villain now. Umber was the hero. Her smallest sib had gone and gotten help. What had she done? Killed two dragons. Tamarin and Carnelian.

Sora began to cry even harder. Before it was small, unnoticeable. Now it shook her whole body. The grief taking hold of every part of her. Every muscle, scale, and even her wings twitched with guilt. Greif. Her mind flooded with thoughts of Icicle.

 _It's all her fault if Icicle hadn't killed Crane then-_ Sora thought, _no, this is all_ my _fault. If I had dealt with my pain like a normal dragon… Taramrin and Carnelian would still be here._ Sora let out another loud sob. Her heart ached. Her mind hurt. She knew that what she had done was wrong. How had she thought it to be so great? In between her wings, she saw Clay rushing down the hall and tilted her head in curiosity. Clay had Tamarin on his back and Pike was running off in front of them. Sora slowly got up. If Clay only had Tamarin, did that mean she was alive?

Hope flared up in Sora's chest and she raced down the halls after them. Thoughts flew out of her head as she focused on running. Running, running towards her problems. Weren't you supposed to run away? No. Sora _needed_ to make sure Tamarin was alright. If Tamarin was alive, she would've only killed one dragon. Only Carnelian. However, wasn't that still enough? Wasn't that still a life? Sora, Clay, and Pike arrived at a lake and Clay laid Tamarin down, into the cool lake. Sora gasped as she saw Tamarin's body, burned and injured. Injuries that she had caused. At the sound of her gasp, Clay and Pike turned around.

"Sora?" Clay asked as questions filled his gaze, "What are you doing here?" He saw the hurt in her gaze and walked closer, putting his large wing around her. He would've made a great BigWings. That thought just made her miss Reed and Phesant.

"I- I just needed" Sora let out a loud sob in between her words, "I just needed to see if Tamarin was" She sobbed again, "Tamarin was okay."

"Oh, Sora." Clay said sympathetically, bringing her into a deeper hug. Sora buried her face into his fireproof scales and cried for a while before Clay walked her over to Tamarin. Sora was released from the hug and she bent down next to the injured form of her friend.

"Oh Tamarin," Sora whispered to the RainWing. Tamarin was lily white with black scorched marks that covered her scales. Sora reached down and touched Tamarin's back lightly. Her eyes welled up and the tears poured over. Sora sat there with looking at her friend. If she unknowingly hurt one dragon, had she killed others? Was Carnelian the only one? Who else had this monster hurt?

"Who else got hurt?" Sora asked, turning to look at Clay with painful eyes.

"Tamarin will bee the only survivor if she survives her burns," Pike said. Sora had forgotten that he was there.

"Who died?" Sora asked him as she turned back to Tamarin's body. Only the RainWing's head was resting out of the water.

"A SkyWing named Carnelian and NightWing named Bigtail," Pike replied, snarling out the last name slightly. The monster had killed two dragons and injured her friend. Sora brought her claws up slightly and looked at them. What had she _done_? She rested her snout on Tamarin's burned head. She closed her eyes. _I'm sorry Tamarin, I didn't mean for this to happen. I wanted Icicle gone. I wanted her gone so bad that I ended up doing this to you. I should tell Clay. I shouldn't tell Clay. I should. I shouldn't._ Sora was yelling at herself inside her thoughts when Clay spoke again, causing her to open her eyes.

"She knocked the scroll shelf on top of her last minute." Clay told her, his warm wing still around her, "Maybe she smelled the smoke or something, but that's probably what saved her."

Sora let out another sob and they sat there for a while. Sora just taking in Tamarin's condition. The burned, chared RainWing's scales were so white that she could pass for an IceWing at a far away distance. White meant that she was in pain, even in sleep. Sora looked over Tamarin's head and saw the reflection of a monster. It was herself. She recognized the scales, the face. However, she couldn't look past the eyes. The eyes that knew what she did. Were they happy? Was she happy with the death that she had caused?

"I'm going to get Tarmin to the infirmary cave. You two can go back to your sleeping caves." Clay said, withdrawing his wing from Sora's back. Pike and Clay walked away, taking Tamarin with them. Sora walked slowly through the halls of the school. _What have I done_ 's filled her head as she looked up. She was in the cafeteria. She looked at the spot where Icicle always sat. _This IS her fault_ Sora thought _if SHE hadn't KILLED MY SISTER TAMARIN WOULDN'T BE HURT!_ Of course, that made sense to her now. What is a murderer supposed to do when they killed the wrong dragons? Sora flew up, high over Icicle's eating place. There was a large, wicked looking stalagmite. She looked around and saw no one. It was safe. She needed this to work. No more dragons had to die.

"This is for you Crane," Sora whispered. She began to claw away at the base of the stalagmite. She softly growled under her breath as small bits of rocks fell to the ground below.

 _Is this the right thing to do?_ She asked herself, slowing down slightly. _NO! Icicle is going to kill others._ The words that Icicle had said nights before danced through her head again. " _Killing is easy enough"_ _She'd been right_ , Sora realized, _I just killed two dragons without trying._ This, to Sora, made Icicle more dangerous. The IceWing had killed before and she would kill again. Sora had convinced herself that her actions had been right. She finished carving away the rock. It was barely hanging on. If even a wing touched it, it would plummet. Plummet right into Icicle's heart. It would kill the killer. Sora flew down and began to walk back to her sleeping cave. She looked at the sleeping form of Icicle before her. The look on Icicle's face grew fierce as Sora laid on her bed. She rolled over to face away from her. Closing her eyes she heard Icicle murmur something that told her that she had done the right thing. Sure, it wasn't as bad as before but it still told her something. Icicle was a killer. She kills dragons. She's killed dragons, including her sister. And she was going to kill more dragons, and soon.

"I'll do it, don't worry," Icicle murmured, "They'll be dead soon. And if you touch him, I'll kill you too." Sora twisted her head as Icicle's face turned more peaceful. The IceWing's claws twitched a few times as if she was killing even in her dream. Sora turned around to sleep, thinking of the dragons that she'd killed today.

Carnelian.

Bigtail.

And most importantly,

Tamarin.

Her friend. Others outside had been slightly injured as well. What had she _done?_

 _Crane, I'll have avenged you. Just wait and see._ Was the last thing that Sora thought before drifting off to sleep.

 **Author's Note -**

 **It's my account ANNIVERSARY! YAYAYYAY! One WHOLE year I've been on here and I'm proud of that. I'm so glad that I've been able to share all these amazing experiences with you all. I hope to be on here for following years to come. I know that this story is a bit sad but the event was sad too. Sora was a sad dragon with a sad past and she's done some sad things as well. I hope yall liked this story! :D**

 **\- Leederlee**


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